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this is my college essay. if it isnt too much trouble 4u, can u rate this from 1-10.. thank nu so much u have no idea how much this means to me.. the question for this essay is what event has effected u, x plane


"Benny? Benny?! Where are you? Oh my goodness! Where's Benny? Has anyone seen Benny? BEN! Where are you?!"
I was around four years old. I lived with my grandmother and my late grandfather. My cousins Benny and Joey were coming to my house, so I was restlessly waiting. They were the people with whom I spent most of my life. We were the best of friends, and they were coming at 8:00 AM so that we could go swimming in the backyard. When they finally arrived, I was ecstatic. I anxiously waited for Benny and Joey to get their floaters on. Benny was always very jumpy, shaking his hands, talking to himself, and I loved him. He wasn't like anybody I had ever met, but my innocence didn't make anything of it. Benny had gone running around the house and so I started playing with Joey.
We were busy having a screaming contest, and all of a sudden we heard the most satisfying words any four-year old could hear, "Go get Benny and you can go into the pool," my aunt said with a smile. We ran to go get Benny with more excitement than you could imagine. He wasn't in the living room, the bedroom, or the kitchen. We grew more anxious. We just wanted to jump into the pool. We called for him a few times, but there was no answer. We came across the bathroom door, and it was closed with a light on. We called in there, but no answer came back. We opened the door but he wasn't there. We informed our aunt that we couldn't find him, and that we just wanted to go swimming. At the sound of hearing that her son was missing, she frantically screamed his name. She ran left and right, but Joey and I thought that she was screaming so frantically just because she knew we wanted to get into the pool. She literally started to run, so fast, that we realized that she probably didn't care that much about us going into the pool anymore. Then it dawned on us that there was something wrong. We searched for Benny everywhere. I went to my bedroom and searched everywhere for him. He wasn't under the bed or in my closet. He was nowhere to be found.
At the tender age of 4, I didn't really think that much could happen to him, but all the tension in the house made me realize something grave may have taken place. All of a sudden, the doorbell rang. I breathed a sigh of relief, Benny had come home. I ran to the door demanding an explanation, except when I got to the door, it wasn't Benny. Actually, it was who I least expected it to be, a police officer. He asked me if any adults were home, so I told him that they were very busy looking for- my grandma rushed to the door and lead him to the backyard. I followed by in curiosity. On the sidewalk next to the pool, I witnessed something I didn't understand at the time. My cousin Benny was sleeping, face up, next to the pool, his mother yelling to him, and patting his face. She was pushing his chest up and down. My cousin Joey and I were standing next to each other. I remember looking at his face, plainly staring at his brother's ordeal. Moments later, EMT rushed in and starting pumping his chest. I noticed Benny's skin was as blue as the water. My grandmother then abruptly took Joey and me into the house and upstairs, where I was filled with questions. I saw an ambulance pull out of the driveway with Benny in it. My Grandmother would attempt to decipher the hysteria to us in her broken accent. I was frightened. What was going to be a day in the pool, turned out to be a day of confusion and heartache. I didn't know what to think, but over and over again, I heard the sentence "He will be alright." A couple days later, Benny came home with a Cookie Monster sticker. I was overjoyed and relieved when I saw him. It was then when I realized that autism was a real problem that Benny had to cope with.
Since then, I have been very sympathetic to the mentally challenged. A few years ago, my best friend introduced me to a camp that his brother attended. His brother, too, had autism. The name of this camp was Camp R.O.B.I.N. My friend Sami and I have spent many great days volunteering at this camp. I love watching these children discover things through experiments that they do at camp. The camp also takes the kids to places like PETCO. They all get so excited when they see even the simplest of things. One boy saw a clown fish, and he screamed "Nemo!" All the kids watch the fish in amazement. I think more people should be as simple as these children because they notice things that most people take for granted, and they are so much happier for it.
I'll never forget the looks on their faces during the talent show. They practiced dance routines throughout the entire summer, and on the last day of camp, they headed to the high school and performed their dances. At the end, all the parents clapped for them, and

Answer
the end was cut off . . . but so far it's a really engaging essay, but the part where you say that more people should be that simple could probably be worded better, but other than that it's pretty good. Hope I was helpful, good luck.