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ive bin dating a capricorn for a year and a half now. i totally adore this man to death. i dated a guy before who was a total jerk to me, leaving me for another woman repeatedly until i could no longer bear it. this new guy- capricorn is very differnt. at first i thought he was a jerk, bc he loved to fit in with people and would try to act cool. however, i learned very early on that he is still genuine guy. i seduced him and won him, but at first i was afraid the relationship wouldnt last and tried to get him to break up with me. he got mad at me and dumped me, but came back a few days later apologizing. he later told me something serious that had happened to him a month later, and i was distant, but helped him out. he suddenly realized i did care about him and has been so good to me and crazy abt me since then. we dont meet a lot like other couples (once a week), we dont talk a lot on the phone or email (except once a week when he calls me on schedule or a second time a week when i call him if i miss him). his strictness in schedule and "seemingly distance" bothered me at first, but i didnt let it get to me. i controlled my gemini obsessiveness, and one thing abt geminis is that we flirt becase we want attention from the one we love, so we make them jelous. i try had to not make him jealous and show him how calm i am inside. i feel so comfortable inside my skin with him. to this day we have not fought since that one day i mentioned earlier. he bought me a heart bracelet made of gold.. which wasnt too expensive.. and he doesnt normally get gifts for girls. he also speaks of continuing the relationship for years.. randomly puts it in there. he also has helped me out during critical times and really cares about me. he tells me he cares abd me and likes me sooooo much... even though he doesnt say he loves me (usually the guys ive dated would have said it by now, even if it felt fake).. i just feel like i dont have to be somebody else or prove anything to him. i love him so much. i mean, we arent considering marriage or anything.. bc we are both realistic and cant think that far.. but i would never cheat on him and i am wondering, is this a fantasy im dreaming to be longterm with a capricorn and maaybe even marry him.. another thing i like about him is that he never pushes me for sex when i dont want to.. sure he's not perfect.. but do you think it would last? or do u think it is just good so far because we are new in the relationship (over 1 year)? do u think he would ever admit he loves me? how long do u think we would last?

Answer
It sounds like you both love and care for each other from what you said. Capricorns do seem to take their sweet time and are cautious before they take it to the next level, so my advice would be to just hang in their and see where it all leads...I have learned that some relationships are meant to be for a short time and there are others that are meant to be for long-term, such as marriage. You'll just have to take it one day at a time, and see where it leads.

My Boyfriend left me the day before Valentines day... Heartbroken... Please read and help me.?

Q. He was my longest relationship, is my first true love.. and the old him was my best friend...
We are both early 20's, he is a gamer, and we've been in a ldr for 2 years...
He once said he thinks i'm the one and that he loved me more than anything and couldn't leave me if he tried and never would or would want to...
Everything was perfect. he was perfect.

He started to change slowly a few months ago since i asked him to not play *one* certain online game. ("Minecraft" long story behind it, but it hurt me...but i even said during the tears trying to get him back, that i'll let him play it even if it hurts me and whatever game he wants to now) & Now is a different person towards me, Doesn't care about me or my feelings, even said he doesn't, and says and does things that deeply hurts me. without no guilt or care or emotion.
All i ask of him is to not add girls on online games... I ask him of this Because *most* of them are flirty / after cyber / like to lead on guys, type of teenage girls... and he even said he was ok with it at one stage and that it doesn't matter... I also ask him of this to stop insecurities, doubts, and false accusations or fights starting. So basically to stop any relationship issues. and because it deeply hurts me when he does chat up girls online..
When we are together in person, it won't matter to me if he does again anyway because i'll be right there with him and feel safe to know that he only wants me...

Its like he's lost all emotion and can't remember everything we've been through together or wants to put any effort to save us and continue with our dreams we had planned. and forgot that his love for me even exists...
Even though 4 days ago he used i love you in a sentence, yesterday he told me he doesn't even have romantic feelings for me or love me more than a friend anymore... it cut me like a knife...

That kills me on the inside because that means he never meant all the things he said he felt about me, because no one would intentionally hurt someone they loved that much like this.
You can't love someone to the point where you say they're your soulmate and love them that much that youd never let them go even if you tried and they were your everything, and then fall out of love in 2 months or under. thats not possible, he either never loved me as much as he said he did... or he still does and he may be confused. and his mind is just clouded from stress. and unhappiness / missing the "old us".
He even says he doesn't know whats 'making him miserable' or why he doesn't love me anymore.

He says we've both changed. but i haven't. hes the only one arguing, being mean, not talking things out, and hurting the other person... I cry everyday...
I'm still the same me, i'm just heartbroken because he said he doesn't love me, doesn't care about me, is doing things that hurt me, and using 'us not being together' as an excuse for it to be Ok to do things that hurt me...

He said he expects me to have "no insecurities or jealousy (..after everything hes been doing to me and the way hes been treating me and hurting me..) and no promises" (..me be unhappy and 'let him' break the promises we've once made together..) if i want to get back with him...
I just need him to be nice to me, care about me and my feelings, and not keep on hurting me intentionally...


Can someone help me help him wake up and realise that his mind is not right. that he's confused and that he's being heartless and is treating me horribly...and that me asking for him to stay with me and do those small things for me is fair? :'(

Some examples of the things hes said to me over msn:

him:I am a man. And Im putting my foot down.
- You agitate me.
- I dont care if its a promise.
me:"putting your foot down" or "having thicker skin" Is not, pushing me away or not caring about me and how i feel, or not caring if you hurt me. Its not those things. those things are being selfish and heartless. :'(
him: I dont care how my mind is. I want to be happy
- Im not thinking about what your saying. To be honest
- but your not telling me what to do anylonger.
- Promises or not
- I dont feel any guilt and yes I dont care. Its not my burden anymore
- Your feelings are not my concern anymore. I want to make myself happy.
- you took my happiness away (The game he played for 2 months....)
- I Much Rather choose friends then you right about now.
- How long weve been friends boasts nothing.
- just because youve been with me for 2 years. and them for 2 months doesnt mean anything to me
- And Im tired of you being in my way
- The reality of the situation is that we are not together.
- So. Like I said. Not my problem
- and I'm only looking out for me.

Answer
I'm seeing two problems here. You asked him to quit playing a game, you don't go into reasons but from the rest of this paragraph I'm assuming it's because of another girl. You've asked him not to have female friends in his games which is unrealistic unless he has a history of hardcore flirting or other intentions toward them. You are aware that a guy can have female friends who are, surprise, just friends right? The second problem here is that his relationship and behavior toward you changed when you asked him to stop playing this game. This could be for a few reasons...

1.) He's sick of your suspicion and jealousy. If you're constantly nagging him for talking to another girl or getting mad at him because somebody flirted with him then that'll ruin a relationship quickly. If he has a history of flirting then, frankly, he's not worth your time.

2.) He has a serious problem with games and chose them over you. I know a guy whose marriage was destroyed by his Warcraft obsession. This doesn't surprise me.

He's chosing his stupid games over you. He may have his reasons, or he may be a complete retard. I don't know, since I don't know him. However one thing remains the same--he's completely insensitive to your feelings now and has shown that he does not care to remedy that. Time to let this one go. Cut the cord, he's made his choice. Move on, don't waste any more time on this loser. It's obvious who he values more in this relationship, and it's 100% all about him.